Life Advice
/Health
Ask Anna: Should I tell my boyfriend about a past infidelity?
Dear Anna,
I’m a 34-year-old woman who’s been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost four years. We’re serious — and lately are talking more and more about marriage. But something from my past has been weighing on me, and I’m struggling with whether or not I should tell him.
About five years ago, in a previous relationship, I...Read more
Inside a network of Facebook groups helping millennials fall in love
PHILADELPHIA -- Nicole Kerr competed with 134 other women to get the attention of her now-fiancé Fran Smythe, a Deptford, New Jersey, finance manager looking for a “fun down-to-earth girl” to settle down with.
That’s because Smythe’s sister-in-law posted his photos to Date Him: Philly, a private Facebook group with over 20,000 members ...Read more
Leave sexy time for the bedroom... not your profile
Nearly all of my clients—probably 99%—express a desire for physical intimacy (which, for simplicity, we'll define as sex, however you define that) in their future relationships. For some, it has always been a top priority, while for others, it’s something they felt was lacking in a previous relationship, making it a key focus for the ...Read more
Ask Anna: We're both introverts, and we never go out -- is this a problem?
Dear Anna,
My girlfriend and I are both in our early 30s and have been together for almost four years. We’re both introverts, and honestly, we’re happiest just hanging out at home, watching movies or playing video games. We hardly ever go out — maybe a dinner here and there or a small gathering with close friends, but we generally avoid ...Read more
From don't to do: The simple secret to a better dating experience
About two-thirds of the way through every meeting with a new client, I get to the part about what qualities or traits they might be looking for in a partner—physical, mental, etc. (The first, longer part is dedicated to learning about the client so I can write the best online dating profile possible.) From their answer to this question, it’s...Read more
Flipping tortillas with chopsticks: California Asian-Latino families create their own culture
SACRAMENTO, Calif. -- Traces of Mexican and Chinese cultures are evident in every corner of the Salinas’ family Woodland, California, home.
In the living room, Chinese history books, paintings and dolls share space with family photos and high school diplomas. The family calls this area the “Chinese room,” said Jesse, a first-generation ...Read more
Mapmaker-turned-artist produces haunting portraits inspired by late sister's struggle with substance use disorder
DENVER -- If eyes are windows to the soul, then the eyes in William Stoehr’s paintings convey the isolation and despair that come with addiction and depression. They are lonely and haunting, especially in one of the pieces he painted of his late sister.
Her eyes are dark and sunken. Perhaps she has been crying. In the bottom left corner, ...Read more
Ask Anna: My partner's family doesn't like me!
Dear Anna,
I’m a 21-year-old woman, and I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost two years. We’re really happy together, but there’s one huge problem: His family does not like me. I’ve tried everything to make a good impression — bringing thoughtful gifts, offering to help with family dinners and always being polite. But no matter ...Read more
Defining the relationship: Exclusivity, labels and commitment
Many of us have heard the phrase “define the relationship,” often shortened to “DTR.” One might say, “We had the DTR talk,” or “We DTR’d it.” But it turns out that one person’s DTR talk is another person’s confusion… often when those two people are in the same exact relationship!
Every Monday on Instagram, I host “Ask ...Read more
How to combat the loneliness epidemic
ATLANTA -- Monica Imani McCullough was an extremely shy child. The Atlanta resident lost her father when she was a teen and years later watched her mother lose a battle with Parkinson’s disease. She survived an emotional divorce, and in 2022 she was diagnosed with follicular non-Hodgkin lymphoma.
Though she had written a book on loneliness ...Read more
Tough reporter has a new assignment: help her 20-something neighbor get a girlfriend
PHILADELPHIA — When you see Lisa DePaulo's byline, you don't think of the Cupid beat. In her career writing for publications like GQ, Vanity Fair, and New York and Philadelphia magazines, this tough cookie's element has had more to do with thugs and scoundrels who whack their girlfriends than nice guys looking for one.
But when her neighbor ...Read more
Q&A: How to talk about politics with people who don't agree with you
These days, there's no surer way to start a fight than to talk politics with someone who disagrees with you. And with election day drawing near, political conversations are increasingly difficult to avoid.
You could muddle your way through the next two months and hope for the best. Or you could take Tania Israel's advice and embrace the ...Read more
Ask Anna: Is it normal to have less sex after moving in together?
Dear Anna,
I'm 26 (F), and my boyfriend (28) and I have been together for almost three years. We moved in together six months ago, and ever since I’ve noticed a pretty big change in our sex life. Before moving in, we used to have sex several times a week, but now it’s once a week, or maybe twice if it’s, like, a special occasion. I didn�...Read more
'I just want this dating process to be done'
I got a text recently from a 40-year-old male client who I’ve been working with on and off over the last few years. It said this: “I’ve been anxious to re-start dating. I just want this process to be done.”
I answered, “When you say that you want the process to be ‘done,’ what do you mean?”
Every week, at least three clients ...Read more
Don't text your ex 'Happy Birthday'
Your ex’s birthday is coming up, and you’re sitting there with your phone in hand, debating whether to send that little “Happy Birthday” text ... and, of course, which emoji to go with it. It seems harmless, right? Maybe even polite. And I get it. You want to show that you still care and remember the important things.
But, often, the ...Read more
Ask Anna: My partner is always on their phone -- am I being needy?
Dear Anna,
I'm a 29-year-old bisexual woman. My girlfriend (30) and I have been together for almost two years, and we recently moved in together. I love her deeply, but I’ve noticed that she’s always on her phone — whether we’re watching TV, having dinner or just hanging out in bed. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself it's no ...Read more
Situationships… How and why?
Ah, the situationship—the modern-day romantic limbo that leaves many of us scratching our heads, wondering, “What are we?” If you’ve ever found yourself in this ambiguous gray area, you’re not alone. Situationships have become increasingly common in today’s dating world (were they always, and now there’s just a name for it?), where...Read more
My best friend is 30 years my senior. Here's what she's taught me about life
LOS ANGELES -- She was 63.
I was 33.
We shared cocktails at a rooftop bar overlooking Sunset Boulevard during golden hour. And the connection was palpable.
No, this isn't the start to an "L.A. Affairs" romance column. But it is about a love affair of sorts. My best girlfriend of the last two decades is 30 years older than me.
I met Loraine ...Read more
How do you make friends outside your generation? These people share how they did it
LOS ANGELES -- On a bench near the Santa Monica Farmer's Market in July, Peggy Cheng recalled the time a television writer pitched her a wacky sitcom centered around the unlikely scenario of a young woman who had befriended her elderly neighbors.
Cheng, who was working in TV development at the time, wasn't impressed.
"She thought it was so ...Read more
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