ArcaMax

Dear Eric: I have been married to my husband for 16 years and we have a wonderful, blended family. Our kids are now grown (ages 26-35). My husband’s first wife died of a drug overdose/swimming accident 23 years ago. They were in the process of a divorce at the time.

Her ashes are in a box in our garage. Many times, over the years, they were ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a friend who I've been friends with for about 10 years. We both share views that lean left. In the past we've shared many dinners discussing the inequities of our country and other political type topics. My friend is constantly lamenting about how unfair our society is and is super empathetic to the plight of the disadvantaged,...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a 47-year-old woman and was diagnosed with a rare terminal illness three years ago after several years of investigations. I have a rough time frame of six to 10 years. I have no family and no close friends. The only person I see is my neighbor who is also my cleaner, but that’s the only time I see her. I am totally alone, ...Read more

Dear Eric: I will turn 65 in a few months and have announced my plans to retire. I have a long list of things I want to do, and after 50 years of employment and saving, I am well situated for these next years. At least, that is what my financial adviser and balance sheets tell me.

I really yearn for more discretionary time and my physical ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have two daughters with special needs. They function around the level of a 10-year-old. They are also nonverbal in public. It is very unlikely that they will ever have a relationship with anyone, much less have children. So, it is likely that I will never be a grandmother. My question is how do I deal with the grief that causes me? ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a young adult with a movement disorder similar to Parkinson's. It causes uncontrollable, violent, jerky, muscle movements, called dyskinesias, in nearly every part of my body. These dyskinesias resemble the effects of illicit substances and can make people who don't know me very uncomfortable. How would you suggest I address this...Read more

Dear Eric: Christmas is a very difficult time for me, and I typically don’t celebrate as I don’t have any close family, and it only brings back painful memories. I moved a couple years ago and found a very great group of friends that have quickly become my chosen family. I was determined to take back how I felt about Christmas and began to ...Read more

Dear Eric: I belong to a small book club that now comprises six older women. All of us have been with the group for more than 30 years. For the most part, we all get along and enjoy the variety of books that are selected to be read each year. We have one member who is very opinionated about everything and does not hesitate to let her thoughts be...Read more

Dear Eric: My wife and I had a good friendship with a single woman, "Barb," for about 20 years. We enjoyed her company, and she went with us on trips, sometimes with her boyfriend of the moment.

She was always a bit problematic as, beside relationship troubles, she had health issues, but we were supportive, and we all had fun together. As we ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a mid-20s nephew who appears to be afflicted with a severe case of failure-to-launch syndrome. He dropped out of college after six months, moved in with his mom (my sister), only interacts with peers via gaming and comes across as utterly apathetic and disengaged from the world.

There was a ray of hope when he went back to ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a non-observant Jew. My spiritual beliefs are very personal, and I don’t discuss them casually. My mother became a Christian. This is important because, as she went deeper into her Christianity, she made friends who shared her beliefs.

One of them is a younger woman she called her spiritual daughter. My mother arranged an ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have been in a relationship with a man going on six years now. I love and care about him deeply. However, we have one serious problem in our relationship. He is always going to his ex-wife’s house. He goes there about three nights a week, coming home drunk afterward.

When I tell him that it really upsets me, he says he is ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have known "Mary" for almost 10 years. We have a strictly business/professional relationship which requires us to meet several times a year.

Although we don't socialize, we do joke around and have small talk about family, pets, travel, movies, etc., when we meet. We've always gotten along well.

I know that Mary is gay (she has ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband's parents are divorced. In the last year or so (after being married to their son for nine years) my in-laws have started communicating with me instead of my husband to make plans. Example: My husband called his dad to make New Year’s plans. A few days later, my father-in-law texted me with the details about times to ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am becoming aware of an increasing anxiety with my pets. Specifically, being separated from them. To briefly put this in perspective, I am recently widowed as of last August. My husband had been sick since 2019. I had no help, and he never took ownership of his own health. Needless to say, this was overwhelming for me.

Throughout ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have years of writing under my belt.

During a recent family visit, I spent a lot of time hearing about grown kids' accomplishments. I asked questions and was a good listener. At one point, my husband read a story he'd written, and the family praised his efforts to the moon.

Meanwhile, no one asked about my writing.

I suppose I ...Read more

Dear Eric: I stayed in an abusive marriage for too long, and for a wide variety of reasons, including that we needed my ex’s income and health insurance to cover chronic medical needs.

My now-adult son does not know the extent of the abuse in my marriage because I hid it. Regardless, he is three times more likely to become an abuser himself ...Read more

Dear Eric: My spouse and I are an older couple with some family members who live in the same town as us and some family who live out of state.

The families who live near us only invite us to functions where a gift is needed, such as weddings and birthdays, etc.

We feel very sad about this since we spend many holidays alone. May I add that my ...Read more

Dear Eric: Valentine’s Day is approaching and members of my family and friends send me “Happy Valentine’s Day” texts, knowing that I am a widow. They claim that Valentine’s is for everybody, not just couples.

I feel otherwise and this just rubs salt into my wounds. These wishes feel to me very thoughtless and insensitive. How do I ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a retired 70-year-old. My mother is 93 and lives alone about 20 miles from me. She has lived in her home for more than 50 years, is relatively healthy and can still take care of herself.

We have discussed assisted-living facilities, but she strongly wishes to remain in her home.

I am her primary caregiver. She does not drive. ...Read more