ArcaMax

Dear Eric: My son and his husband have been married for 14 years. When they first visited, we did not want to make a great show of it or tell the greater family all at the same time. We were fearful of hurtful gossip/statements. My son and then-boyfriend took great offense at this and stopped contact with us for a while.

We had known our son ...Read more

Dear Eric: A couple of years ago I reconnected with an old friend, and I invited her and her husband to my cottage where she and I had spent some good times together over 20 years ago.

Back then I often had a few too many drinks and also smoked. I don’t anymore. But she still does.

Over the two days at my cottage, her drinking was to the ...Read more

Dear Eric: My wife and I are in our early 70s and live in a suburban neighborhood where every other person has a dog, or so it seems. Consequently, everyone seems to know everyone else.

We're both in good health but have noticed some of the younger underemployed/remote worker neighbors have become a bit overly solicitous. On one occasion, I ...Read more

Dear Readers: Letter writer “Single By Choice” asked for advice relating to his choice to swear off dating after an erectile dysfunction diagnosis. Many responses poured in. What struck me about every single one of the responses was how empathetic and solution-focused they were. I’m sharing five of the replies in hopes that they inspire a ...Read more

Dear Eric: Mid-pandemic, my family and I moved to my husband’s hometown, hundreds of miles from our old city. It was a very difficult transition for me. I am a stay-at-home mom and the opportunities to meet people were very limited because of the pandemic.

However, about a year ago, I met two other moms with young children in the neighborhood...Read more

Dear Eric: We hardly ever see my son, daughter-in-law and 8-year-old grandson. Their time is very skewed toward my daughter-in-law's family. We get along very well with my daughter-in-law's parents, and we consider ourselves friends. We have never had words or any hint of a problem with my son and daughter-in-law.

But it very clearly seems we ...Read more

Dear Eric: My aunt on my mother's side, told me that there was something she needed to tell me, but that I'd have to wait until my mother passed. My mother was sick at the time, so I let it go.

My mother passed away 10 years ago, sadly, but after allowing us all time to grieve, I asked my aunt what it was she had to tell me.

However, when I ...Read more

Dear Eric: My sister’s only son (and my only nephew) is incarcerated in another state and will remain so for many more years for sex crimes against a child. I am still flabbergasted as to how he could commit such a heinous crime.

My sister maintains contact with him, but no one else in the family is interested in communicating with him. ...Read more

Dear Eric: When the pandemic started, I began playing online poker with friends I grew up with. We all live in different cities and used to see each other once a year in person but now we play cards and talk once a week.

One of them makes comments once in a while that could be interpreted as general disdain for non-white immigrants (we’re all...Read more

Dear Eric: I love my boyfriend. We’ve been dating for a year and it’s the first time I can say I’ve developed feelings for someone. But I see my attraction dwindling due to a few factors, mostly having to do with hygiene.

We’re both in our early 30s and he’s a healthy and clean person, but he doesn’t seem to care about certain ...Read more

Dear Eric: My adult son was a stellar athlete and scholar in our small Midwest high school. But as the years went on, he ended up suffering from chronic pain due to a back injury, which thwarted a career path after college. A year ago, he was diagnosed with long Covid, which he and his partner still have. He recently also received a mental ...Read more

Dear Eric: My brother and sister-in-law visit infrequently, usually only once or twice a year, including a major holiday. After each visit I tell my husband that we will not host them again.

In the past, their arrival/departure times have been inconvenient. They converse loudly after others have retired for the evening or before others have ...Read more

Dear Eric: My youngest daughter, a pediatrician, got a divorce two years ago (her husband had been taking money from her practice and not telling her). Her mother and I divorced 40 years ago and are on good terms. For whatever reason, my present wife and I almost never saw her or her kids. There was no falling out or other reason for her not to ...Read more

Dear Eric: Even though I started off school smart and curious, starting middle school, I did horribly. I couldn't manage my time wisely. I couldn't organize my thoughts, and it was paralyzing. They suggested I be tested for ADHD. I was able to mask any symptoms with a proctor standing over my shoulder, so I passed with flying colors. They ...Read more

Dear Eric: I'm not close to my sister. Over the years, there has been very little contact, except when she needs money. She and two of her adult daughters have called asking for money, one asking more than once. I want to keep peace in the family, so I've given it to them. They said they would pay it back. Not only have they not done so, but ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband loves going to the gym since he has retired. But he goes at 11 p.m. or 12 midnight. He said that going at that time there are just a couple of people there and he has access to all the machines, which is fine. The downside is that when he comes back home at 1:30-2 a.m. the garage door or the lights or the door just opening...Read more

Dear Eric: Within five years of each other, both of my adult children died of illness and an accident. It has been three years since the second loss, and the grief is still harsh. But I am getting counseling.

I was a young mother, so I have years left to be active. I am finding new ways to be of service in my community, especially with ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am 80 years old and have been married to the best possible wife for 33 years. We connect and are soulmates. My question is: why have I recently found myself jealous about her affair with a 17-year-old high school student when she was a 27-year-old teacher? This was mentioned a long time ago in our sharing about former relationships....Read more

Dear Eric: I have a friend I’ve known since high school. We are now in our 30s. Although we are different and have different interests, we have enough common ground to maintain our friendship. I've traveled extensively outside the country and she wants us to go on an international trip together. I do not want to, but I don't know how to say it...Read more